Spotify is no longer single

Does anyone else feel like Spotify knows them better than anyone else sometimes?

I jump on in the morning to crank some tunes and there’s all these new suggestions for music to listen to. And I love them all.

Aside from the occasional Wiggles track which I attribute to my Disney playlist.

And then there’s the playlists created based on what you’ve listened to, and suggested radios which are all so great I can never choose which one to begin with.

Spotify, you know me so well. Spotify listens and aims to please. It’s exciting and entertaining and soothing all at once. Great relationship material if you ask me.

The blame game

Just to clarify, specifically to the media.

Australia’s State leaders didn’t release COVID-19 upon their residents. Nor did they initiate the surges.

So don’t interview them like they did.

They also are not happy about re-visiting restrictions and putting hundreds of thousands of people out of work.

So don’t interview them like they are.

We are all in this together.

#aussieaussieaussie

Starving or precious??

It’s not news that most of Victoria is in lockdown. While I can’t imagine the frustration, it seems residents are starving with the lack of notice they’ve been given.

Bit drastic don’t we think?

Surely the second surge announcements splashed all over the media for the past week has been an indicator? TV, Digital and Print. #noexcuses unless your Helen Keller.

Or how about the panic buying resuming, with limits in place once again at major supermarkets? That made it a bit obvious, no?

Apparently it’s the ones who didn’t panic buy who have been forced into lockdown. Because the one’s that did should be well off no doubt with enough toilet paper to cover a family of five to eat the worlds spiciest curry for days.

I just think perhaps these claims which are implying human rights violations are a tad exaggerated. By ‘starving’ I wonder if its more so that the milk has expired and they’ve had to have dry cereal for breakfast with black coffee. Or heaven forbid skip breakfast before indulging in a camembert and turkey sandwich on sourdough for lunch. On a dining table with perhaps a porcelain vase of some sort as the centrepiece.

Or perhaps, perhaps, they are being honest and making statements like “Yea we got told today just as I was emptied the milk into my pancake batter”, which a media representative has transcribed as “we are starving.”

Perhaps it’s the media that’s starving.

Tutorial 3: Sex Appeal

Is there something in the Barista training 101 manual that states they must be tall and dark with a surprisingly sexy moustache? Perhaps right after the part that teaches them how to be adoringly friendly with the ability to make anyone, they’ve grinded beans for feel like the most important person in the world.

To the point, you think you’ve got a shot, if you’re a woman or a man. That’s how good they are.

Smiling barista holding a coffee cup

Or is it just me?

I also feel like barista’s are the only ones who can totally own the mo. Other men can easily be described as creepy. But throw a denim apron, coffee machine and carton of milk in front of him and he’s Chris Hemsworth.

I wonder if it legitimately is in the manual, so it minimises unnecessary complaints. I’d think twice about asking for some extra milk in my coffee when the cup is half full of froth for the sake of not inconveniencing the tall attractive male. Especially if I think I’ve got a shot. Don’t want to appear to be high-maintenance now do I.

But more so, I’m talking the complaints where they really are not problems at all, but drinkers feel entitled to raise an issue to maintain some sort of coffee snob image. Or to highlight they have switched to a dairy-free milk.

“Is this on almond?” she says, as she takes a glance at her Lorna Jane dressed girlfriend to see if she is paying attention.

She’s not. She’s hash-tagging #lifeiscoffe #blessed #lovinglife #activemondays #cameltoeundies #husbandischeatingonme

Ok, those last couple of hash tags are not likely. But sometimes a lonely bitter blogger who hates men has got to throw her two cents in.

No one listens anyway, unless it’s on Twitter.