Waitin’ on a sunny day

I’m waitin’………

Waitin’ on a sunny day.

Gonna chase the clouds away.

Waiting on a sunny day.

In light of recent events, I’m going from south to north of Australia to pursue my passion for… well… being happy and living life to the max.

I’m chasing the clouds that have dampened the beginning of 2017, legging through them and into the sun.

After a year of living the country life, I have changed for the better with an attitude that embraces people for who they are and gives the time of day to all that matters.

Forget sending troubled teens to councillors and rehab centres. Send them out bush for a year to clean up and all will be right again.


The difference in personality, attitude and passion in the local people of the Tatiara in comparison to the obnoxious folk from Adelaide is huge and obvious.


It only took me a year to realise that there is no point in rushing through life. Every moment is an experience.




Scenario: You have broken your vacuum cleaner.

Country fix: Head down to the hardware store, speak to Ray who owns the store and is still working the front counter despite having plenty of income to cover a salaried front counter position. You learn that Ray has a farm 5kms out of town and his three girls all play for the Mundulla tigers. The eldest is raising money to compete in the Worlds greatest shave and is having a sausage sizzle at the local pool that afternoon. He has the part you need, but is unsure if your model is a new or old version. Ray agrees for you to return the product should it not suit your vacuum cleaner.

Three hours later, you head to the pool, with a vacuumed house and meet Ray’s eldest daughter. You buy a snag for $2 and take a quick dip, before discussing the quietness of the season with the pool attendant who is in year 12 at school and wants to be a vet.

City fix: You go to Bunnings. Spend about 57 minutes in traffic and manage to squeeze into a park after about 12 go’s as it is a tight fit and people keep walking behind you with trolleys. You head into the shop and search for anyone to direct you to vacuum cleaners as the store is as big as China.

You find the section and after so much time you think you have the piece you need and head to the checkout.

Jane at the checkout does not even make eye contact with you and points at a self service machine that is now free for your use before she glances back at her phone to see if her most recent FB check in has received any new likes.

You buy your piece after the self checkout takes your money without hesitation and head home in the traffic, stressed out and anxious to get home and continue vacuuming because The Block starts in 8 minutes.

You get home and the part does not fit but you don’t have the receipt because the self checkout was out of paper. You jump online and buy the first available vacuum that pops up in your search that will arrive in 5-7 working days.

You order in Chinese for $65 because it was free delivery with orders over $50 and watch the block with a dirty carpet.

Now you decide which is the better experience and which one we were put on earth to be exposed to.

The smile to frown ratio in these two experiences would be completely different.

The whole country procedure would see smiles and genuine interest in all that is happening.

The city scenario would be a rush of frowning and anxiety.

We got too greedy folks. Too, too greedy.

Give other people the time of day. That’s why there are other people.



And so begins the next new adventure.

Goodbye Bordertown…. Hello Townsville.

Sunny, sunny Townsville.

Dancing in the wetlands

I cannot dance. Thing is, that does not stop me.

When I go walking with my pup, one of the best things about being out in the middle of nowhere is that I can listen to my music and jump up and down like a retard, waving my arms in the air and singing the lyrics that I don’t even know.

I can blast my music as loud as I want without a care in the world about others judging my terrible dancing, singing and music that on this particular morning was the Annie soundtrack.

Since being out in the country I have only ever taken my pup to the wetlands that is a huge fenced off area with swamps, trees, mud and benches. There is no one else ever out at the wetlands.

When I say no one, I mean humans. Cow, fox and rabbits don’t count.

But today, a truck pulled into the carpark and two driver in high vis came dashing around the corner to see if I was ok.




Apparently my singing and dancing resembled crying out for help.



I think I’ll stick to walking in the wetlands.

Manchester terror

Only hours into this devastating blast in Manchester and the media are questioning the security in every interview and update.


Blame the terrorists.

Blame the idiot suicide bomber who thought it would be ok to wonder into a concert hall foyer and detonate a blast that has directly resulted in deaths and casualties of girls who have not even celebrated their 21st.

And of each of these deaths, another hundred who are affected and mourning from a horrific loss and the entire world fearing for their safety and that of their families.




They had a plan and it was inevitable, regardless or where and when it was going to happen, and of who was on bag checks or cloak room.



We all know this could have happened in Australia or the US.

Blame the terrorists.

Please explain.

So, a 17year old walks into a bank and has about $145 in their account and asks for a loan for $50,000.

Would this be approved?

I’m sorry, but computer says no. No, no. no.

Even if they were 18, it’s still a no, right?

So. Why are these kids then able to go to university, commit to a degree and borrow $50,000 in a HECS debt?


It’s the same thing right?

So maybe, just maybe, they should just lend all year 12 students $50,000 upon completion and let them decide what they want to do with it?

I mean, it does not seem fair that if someone wants to be a doctor, all they have to do is pass a test and then they can borrow all the money in the world to achieve their dream. Pretty sure there is no cap when it comes to HECS. (Trust me, I know. I spent five years at university.)

And if someone wants to open up a florist, or volunteer around the world, they have to work their ass off for years, to save enough money to even begin the achieve their dream

And even in this time, it’s highly likely that they will be corrupted with ASOS, smashed avocado, alcohol, ecstasy, spray tans, instagram and sex.


In which case they end up in Colombian prisons or married at 22 with three kids and forgetting their dreams that are not likely to ever be achieved.

But hey, at least they are debt free right.


Debt free. And stupid.

Buy an ice-cream

In another Masterchef challenge, they had to make this crazy fire rocket cracker desert.

They were given 3 and a half hours to do this.



Why on earth would anyone spend three and a half hours making a desert, when they can just go to the shop.

Or Gelatissimo.


I don’t get it.

It was pretty much just chocolate and raspberry mousse too.


They had something similar on the desert bar at Pizza Hut ‘All you can eat’ restaurants back in the day.

Who cares if she did it.

A young girl getting caught with drugs in a foreign country is a terrible scenario to imagine.
Cassie Sainsbury has denied the claims.
Before I continue, let’s not forget that this girl is just 22 years old which leaves her with little life experience or wisdom (obviously).
If she is guilty, then it was a really dumb thing to have done. But we’ve all done dumb things at some stage, and some of us more than once.
I mean, I’m 31 and I got kicked out of a club just weeks ago for scissor kicking on the dance floor.
This girl is in a foreign prison facing a life long sentence and what does her home country do?
Bombard the media with reasons to believe that she is guilty.
It’s all out there today with ‘debt’s and failed dreams’ which are only making the public believe that she has become a drug mule.
Have we forgotten that Cassie is someone’s daughter?
Being in debt at such a young age would be a terrible thing to be facing and as unwise as she is, Cassie was just acting her age in running of to South America to sort her life out, or just take a break.
She has obviously run into a string of bad people, that have seen her face some hard decisions.
I am in no way agreeing with what she did or didn’t do, but there is no need to judge so quickly without thinking about how dumb we were as kids and how easily this could have been the result of peer pressure, or a really bad judgement call by a depressed woman who thought she had nothing to lose, which is really quite sad.
Let’s just bring the local girl home and let her sort her life out with local police, rehab, centrelink, job networks, whatever it takes.
There is a good chance that the media who have hit us with all these ‘facts’ have at some stage of their lives done a line, taken a pill, gotten behind the wheel after a few, not paid a bar tab, I could go on and on!
The difference is that these people who have broken the law at some stage or another have been just a few years older to know that difference between doing it in your own country, and doing it overseas.
So before you start making claims about guilty or not guilty, think hard about what you were like at the age of 22.


And lastly, fail or no fail, it’s pretty impressive that this girl was committed enough to attempt to run her own business, when others her age are living off their parents and instagramming their top scores on candy crush before spending any income on a new dress that leaves little to the imagination to take out and wear while they drop $18 a drink for a vodka cranberry.



Master idiots

Dear Masterchef contestants,

Stop putting vegetables and herbs in icecream.

It’s unnecessary.

Besides, coriander is expensive. Save that shit for a stir fry. Or maybe you prefer chocolate in a beef teriyaki.

Also unnecessary.


Rely on no one

I’m so sick of being let down.

I’ve come up with the perfect solution: Rely on no one.

I don’t even know why they bothered coming up with the term; reliable.

It’s not a thing. If it was once, it certainly is no longer. It’s a big fat myth like a unicorn.

If you stop relying on people, you will never be let down again.

My one and only serious post. And that’s as serious as I will ever get.

I guess today was just my last straw, of being let down.  It was all it took from me to go from working my ass off to now researching how long I can jet off to an island in Thailand over a glass of red. (Okay, bottle. And a bag of fruchocs.)

I fly out June 14.